Kung failed to commit suicide and was sent to a psychiatric ward. The teachers and parents were shocked because he had always been a “good kid” with excellent academic performance. He told the doctor that he forced himself to be the best child in the eyes of his parents and teachers, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t do it. Yesterday, he asked the doctor emotionally if he knew what kind of pain a good kid was in.
First, good children can always solve all their problems and solve problems for others. Bad children can rely on others without helping others. Second, good children will be criticized as long as they do one bad thing. Even if they have done good things a thousand times before, they will not be praised because they have been taken for granted. As for bad children, as long as they do one thing that is not too bad, they will be praised and win the “Best Improvement Award”. Kung is jealous of other naughty classmates with poor grades, but he reminds himself that good children should not be jealous of others.
Third, a good kid usually doesn’t get attention easily unless they can break their personal record again and do something better. A bad kid attracts attention every day. This kind of attention is exactly what every child longs for. Kung always reminds himself that a good kid “can only get better” and “continuously improve and improve.” Fourth, good children are scolded and punished far more often than bad children because good children continue to scold and punish themselves every day. Suicide is Kung’s punishment for himself. On the contrary, children who are hated will never blame themselves, the worst punishment for them is detention, which is no big deal. Kung felt it was very unfair, but he would not allow himself to report his classmates’ violations because good children should be tolerant.
Clinging to a black-and-white thinking pattern. Never letting go. Not only this will end with lifelong suffering, but it can also lead to death. Kids are kids. There is no doubt that every child has a share of the beauty that comes from life. The difference between good and evil lies only in each action, calculated separately. Focus on the incident, not the person. It is bad to wrong and hurt yourself or others. It is not a bad thing as long as you do not hurt yourself or others, even if it is inconsistent with the expectations of parents, teachers, and the mainstream of society. It’s great to be kind to yourself while not hurting others.
(Details of the story have been modified to protect patient privacy)
Written by: Dr. William Chui
Translated by: Cheuk Long Chan
